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KILL TONY #395 - RYAN SICKLER + TREVOR WALLACE

2019-10-08

Ryan Clement

Bucket Pull

Watch Ryan Clement's Kill Tony episode 395 set with a timestamped video, full transcript, and line-by-line joke breakdown. This set has 1 bit, 1 joke beat, 0.06 punch density, 0.00 tag density.

Career avg·1.00 bits/set·1.00 beats/set·0.06 punch density·0.00 tag density·1 set

This set·1 bit·1 beat·0.06 punch density·0.00 tag density

[Bit 1]

Thanks a lot. How you guys doing? You're pretty good? So when I was 12 I learned how to

masturbate. Oh god. You did it so much earlier right? Okay. But yeah the only

problem was is that I didn't know what to do with it. You know how do I dispose of

of this magical substance.

So like a brilliant 12 year old, I just picked a corner of my room.

It was the most dim lit sexy corner, you know.

And I just kind of made it happen there.

Always.

For like four months straight.

And so long story short, I come home from school one day and my mom, she was a good

"Mom, nice lady, very Christian.

"Love to clean my room when I was gone, you know?"

So I come home, walk up the stairs,

my mom is in the magic corner,

and she's got some cleaning supplies

and she's just kinda cleaning away.

And she says, "Ryan, if you spill orange juice,

"I don't give a shit, just clean it up afterwards."

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setupThanks a lot. How you guys doing? You're pretty good? So when I was 12 I learned how to

setupmasturbate. Oh god. You did it so much earlier right? Okay. But yeah the only

setupproblem was is that I didn't know what to do with it. You know how do I dispose of

setupof this magical substance.

setupSo like a brilliant 12 year old, I just picked a corner of my room.

setupIt was the most dim lit sexy corner, you know.

setupAnd I just kind of made it happen there.

setupAlways.

setupFor like four months straight.

setupAnd so long story short, I come home from school one day and my mom, she was a good

setup"Mom, nice lady, very Christian.

setup"Love to clean my room when I was gone, you know?"

setupSo I come home, walk up the stairs,

setupmy mom is in the magic corner,

setupand she's got some cleaning supplies

setupand she's just kinda cleaning away.

setupAnd she says, "Ryan, if you spill orange juice,

punchline"I don't give a shit, just clean it up afterwards."