Theo Constantino

Bucket PullSmall Joke Book

Career avg·3.00 bits/set·3.00 beats/set·0.69 punch density·2.00 tag density·1 set

This set·3 bits·3 beats·0.69 punch density·2.00 tag density·Small Joke Book

Watch Theo Constantino’s set

Skips to 29:47 in the episode

[Bit 1]

I gotta say, Austin's a really nice town.

As soon as I got here, homeless people kept coming up to me,

shaking their change cups.

So much that I had to say, "No, thank you, I have enough."

So nice.

That was a joke, I took the money.

I'm broke, not stupid.

[Bit 2]

Everyone's trying to afford a house.

I'm trying to afford a bidet.

Man, I had to make one at home.

You can too.

All you need is water balloons and a friend you can trust.

[Bit 3]

I live in a pretty rough neighborhood.

Found out a bunch of perverts live near me, so I'm moving.

Because there's nothing I hate more than competition.

Relax.

I'm not on any of those lists.

I'm that good.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Beat Premise

“A homeless person shaking a cup implies begging, but reveals an accidental offer of money.”

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setupI gotta say, Austin's a really nice town.

setupAs soon as I got here, homeless people kept coming up to me,

setupshaking their change cups.

punchlineSo much that I had to say, "No, thank you, I have enough."

tagSo nice.

tagThat was a joke, I took the money.

tagI'm broke, not stupid.