2024-12-10

Set 4 · Episode 695

Matt Walker

Bucket PullYoungMan

Career avg·1.67 bits/set·2.67 beats/set·0.19 punch density·0.00 tag density·3 sets

This set·1 bit·1 beat·0.04 punch density·0.00 tag density

Watch Matt Walker’s set

Skips to 45:14 in the episode

[Bit 1]

All right man, so growing up,

I'm sure everyone has that strange uncle.

So growing up, I'm sure everyone has that one weird uncle.

My weird uncle used to tell us these crazy ass ghost stories.

And when we get too scared, he would tell us,

If you're so scared when you fall asleep,

you don't just fall asleep facing the wall.

So if a ghost comes in the middle of the night,

you won't see him.

And one night, I fell asleep over there

and I must've forgot the rule.

And sure enough, I felt this like ghost-like presence

hovering above me.

And I woke up, and this strange ghost-like figure

making these weird noises, these, ugh, ugh.

So I fucking freaked out and I faced the wall.

I said, "Go to sleep, bro, go to sleep."

And I woke up the next morning and it must've been real

'cause I had all this like ghost slime

on the back of my head.

And so I fucking freaked out and I ran downstairs

with my cousin, I said, bro, you'll never guess.

There was a ghost in my room and he touched the slime

and he goes, oh dude, what a coincidence.

When dad drinks a lot, I know a ghost slime in my butt.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Beat Premise

“A ghost encounter implies haunting, but reveals abuse.”

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setupAll right man, so growing up,

setupI'm sure everyone has that strange uncle.

setupSo growing up, I'm sure everyone has that one weird uncle.

setupMy weird uncle used to tell us these crazy ass ghost stories.

setupAnd when we get too scared, he would tell us,

setupIf you're so scared when you fall asleep,

setupyou don't just fall asleep facing the wall.

setupSo if a ghost comes in the middle of the night,

setupyou won't see him.

setupAnd one night, I fell asleep over there

setupand I must've forgot the rule.

setupAnd sure enough, I felt this like ghost-like presence

setuphovering above me.

setupAnd I woke up, and this strange ghost-like figure

setupmaking these weird noises, these, ugh, ugh.

setupSo I fucking freaked out and I faced the wall.

setupI said, "Go to sleep, bro, go to sleep."

setupAnd I woke up the next morning and it must've been real

setup'cause I had all this like ghost slime

setupon the back of my head.

setupAnd so I fucking freaked out and I ran downstairs

setupwith my cousin, I said, bro, you'll never guess.

setupThere was a ghost in my room and he touched the slime

setupand he goes, oh dude, what a coincidence.

punchlineWhen dad drinks a lot, I know a ghost slime in my butt.