Gary Falcon

Golden TicketMan

Career avg·4.50 bits/set·4.50 beats/set·0.41 punch density·0.00 tag density·2 sets

This set·6 bits·6 beats·0.32 punch density·0.00 tag density

Watch Gary Falcon’s set

Skips to 9:08 in the episode

[Bit 1]

How about William Montgomery right here?

I've never wanted to suck off a Smurf more in my life.

[Bit 2]

That movie Oppenheimer bombed in Japan.

[Bit 3]

Do you ever fart at the bar and then forget that you farted?

And you're like, who smells like semen?

[Bit 4]

Look at Tony.

What a weird-looking muppet.

He looks like if Jim Henson were asked to build a faggot.

[Bit 5]

I want to go to a restaurant, crowded restaurant,

and be like, "Oh, my God," on my phone, like,

"My wife's having a boy!"

And then everyone's like, "Hey!" and they cheer.

And I'm like, "Oh, shit, my phone broke up.

She's having an abortion."

[Bit 6]

I like being at a bar,

and when a woman asks where the bathroom is,

I point to my mouth.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Beat Premise

“William Montgomery is like a Smurf because both are tiny blue men.”

Joke Type

analogy

Lines

setupHow about William Montgomery right here?

punchlineI've never wanted to suck off a Smurf more in my life.