2025-07-29

Set 13 · Episode 729

Ari Mati

Bucket PullWhiteManMiddle-Age

Career avg·2.40 bits/set·3.40 beats/set·0.53 punch density·1.14 tag density·5 sets

This set·2 bits·3 beats·0.21 punch density·0.67 tag density

Watch Ari Mati’s set

Skips to 1:57:07 in the episode

[Bit 1]

- So I've been dating a bitch.

See the problem with me is I'm a jealous guy.

I can't help it.

I went through her like Instagram

and there's like a lot of pictures from Miami.

But she works at Chick-fil-A, you know.

I go through the pictures, no guy.

You might see like a ligament, you know.

You know, like a hand on a knee.

You try to zoom into that hand,

it's a fucking prehistoric.

That's who's paying.

[Bit 2]

And she's got this fucking friend.

Every fucking girl has a friend, some Dylan.

You know that guy who's lingering around your girl?

Always playing the long game, you know?

You ask her about Dylan, she's like, "Dylan?"

You're worried about Dylan?

I've known him for a decade, I think he's gay.

And then you meet Dylan, you look into his eyes.

He ain't gay.

He's on the bench, fucker.

You look at Dylan like, "I know the game.

Dylan, a wolf knows a wolf.

You suck a few dicks to throw me off."

All of a sudden, eating my girls pussy, you're like, "Oh my God, isn't this crazy?"

So the only thing to do next week, I'm sucking Dylan off.

Just to see if it's true.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Beat Premise

“Vacation photos implies a boyfriend, but reveals a sugar daddy.”

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setup- So I've been dating a bitch.

setupSee the problem with me is I'm a jealous guy.

setupI can't help it.

setupI went through her like Instagram

setupand there's like a lot of pictures from Miami.

setupBut she works at Chick-fil-A, you know.

setupI go through the pictures, no guy.

setupYou might see like a ligament, you know.

setupYou know, like a hand on a knee.

setupYou try to zoom into that hand,

setupit's a fucking prehistoric.

punchlineThat's who's paying.