David Edwards

Bucket PullMedium Joke Book

Watch David Edwards's Kill Tony episode 766 set with a timestamped video, full transcript, and line-by-line joke breakdown. This set has 5 bits, 5 joke beats, 0.77 punch density, 1.00 tag density.

Career avg·5.00 bits/set·5.00 beats/set·0.77 punch density·1.00 tag density·1 set

This set·5 bits·5 beats·0.77 punch density·1.00 tag density·Medium Joke Book

[Bit 1]

Hello, I know I look like I just fucked a pair of balloons.

[Bit 2]

I've also been known to look like a chicken

that just got done pecking the ground,

is what it is, man.

[Bit 3]

No guys, really, I just wanted to come out here

and acknowledge the fact that I am the unwanted love child

of Uncle Laser and Ellen DeGeneres.

Just the ultimate gay baby.

It's been years, they refuse to contact me.

[Bit 4]

So I actually moved down here from Utah to get in touch.

But I kinda got distracted guys.

A lot of just amazing Latina women here.

To all my Latina women, I am like a baboon under the sheets.

Brutal hemorrhoids guys.

It's, it's.

[Bit 5]

Have you guys ever seen the ring?

Specifically the scene where the ghost lady

is like crawling out of the TV?

That's me on the share dude.

I am just grunting, sweating.

Like an NFL linebacker, dude.

It is, it's quite the sight.

Thank you guys.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Joke Type

analogy

Lines

punchlineHello, I know I look like I just fucked a pair of balloons.