2026-05-19

Set 13 · Episode 768

Matt Worldly

Bucket PullMedium Joke Book

Career avg·1.00 bits/set·3.00 beats/set·0.27 punch density·1.00 tag density·1 set

This set·1 bit·3 beats·0.27 punch density·1.00 tag density·Medium Joke Book

Watch Matt Worldly’s set

Skips to 1:54:12 in the episode

[Bit 1]

In high school, my art teacher was like,

"Hey, does anybody in here know how to speak Arabic?"

And she was getting ready to train us for, like, a calligraphy lesson.

And I was like, "Fuck it."

I'm like, "Yeah, I speak Arabic."

She goes, "Go ahead, Matt. Speak some Arabic for us."

Arabic for us and I said, "La la la la la la la."

And everybody laughed in the classroom except for her.

She was like, "Matt, that's rude.

That's insensitive.

Does anybody here actually know how to speak some Arabic?"

And I was like, "Well, yeah.

I do."

And she was like, "Are you actually going to say something in Arabic this time?"

And I'm like, "For sure."

I said, "But I just did."

It wasn't cool.

I'm like, "I'm not going to do it again."

She goes, "Go ahead."

And I said, in perfect Arabic, I said, "Lakadam secto benachina."

And she gasped.

She was like, "Oh my God."

She's like, "That was beautiful.

Do you know what it translates to?"

I said, "Hell yeah, I learned it from Call of Duty.

It means we've got control of a hostage."

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Beat Premise

“Claiming Arabic fluency implies real Arabic, but reveals nonsense syllables.”

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setupIn high school, my art teacher was like,

setup"Hey, does anybody in here know how to speak Arabic?"

setupAnd she was getting ready to train us for, like, a calligraphy lesson.

setupAnd I was like, "Fuck it."

setupI'm like, "Yeah, I speak Arabic."

setupShe goes, "Go ahead, Matt. Speak some Arabic for us."

punchlineArabic for us and I said, "La la la la la la la."

tagAnd everybody laughed in the classroom except for her.