Matt Reavis

Bucket PullAsianMedium Joke Book

Career avg·1.00 bits/set·4.00 beats/set·0.47 punch density·0.40 tag density·1 set

This set·1 bit·4 beats·0.47 punch density·0.40 tag density·Medium Joke Book

Watch Matt Reavis’s set

Skips to 1:24:27 in the episode

[Bit 1]

Fuck, man. I just got addicted to OnlyFans.

Yeah, man. You guys realize OnlyFans is like the new form of scratchoffs?

Yeah, it'd be on the homepage. It's blurry picture, $5.

I can afford that.

I bought ten of them one time like their pack of Pokemon cards.

I started ripping them looking for a Charizard.

It was just a bunch of EVs. I was like, "Goddammit."

Yeah, one time, dude, I bought a ten pack worth of toes.

Ten dollars. I'm like, "Bitch, this is four dollars worth of toes max."

Yeah, I looked at it, I was like, I sent another dollar and ninety-nine just to message her.

I was like, "Bitch, this is four dollars worth of toes max."

So he painted skin on that pinky toe.

You paint-- that's a nub.

Only Fans is-- I feel like Only Fans is like the new form of--

Fucking fantasy football.

Yeah.

They get the fan groups together and start competing for the MVP.

Yeah, the most valuable pussy is just crazy.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Beat Premise

“OnlyFans is like scratch-off lottery tickets because both involve a blurry payoff.”

Joke Type

analogy

Lines

setupFuck, man. I just got addicted to OnlyFans.

setupYeah, man. You guys realize OnlyFans is like the new form of scratchoffs?

setupYeah, it'd be on the homepage. It's blurry picture, $5.

punchlineI can afford that.