Set 4 · Episode 725
Aaron Belisle
Bucket PullDisabled
Career avg·3.00 bits/set·5.00 beats/set·0.35 punch density·0.20 tag density·1 set
This set·3 bits·5 beats·0.35 punch density·0.20 tag density
Watch Aaron Belisle’s set
Skips to 34:58 in the episode
[Bit 1]
I've been in hospitals all week with no insurance because I'm going blind in my left eye and
they're like, "It's not pink eye.
It's not glaucoma.
Did you get acid in your eye?"
Do I look like someone who's allowed to work with fucking acid?
I know you idiot, I ate a Tide Pod.
[Bit 2]
Bruh, God just doesn't like me.
He saw me minding my own business and thought,
fuck, I missed a spot on the left side.
[Bit 3]
I've been trying to figure out American healthcare
and I don't get it.
You can get pet insurance for like $80 a month
and it covers 90%.
You save like $6,000 a year to be a fucking chihuahua.
You know what?
Maybe those teenagers with litter boxes in school are fucking genius.
People already talk to me loud and cute.
They pat my head.
I'm gonna get pet insurance and identify as a fucking dog.
So if you see my girlfriend walking me around on a leash,
it isn't a kink.
I just didn't like my HMO.
Bit 1 · Beat 1
Beat Details
Beat Premise
“Acid exposure question implies lab work, but reveals appearance not lab-qualified.”
Joke Type
misdirectLines
setupI've been in hospitals all week with no insurance because I'm going blind in my left eye and
setupthey're like, "It's not pink eye.
setupIt's not glaucoma.
setupDid you get acid in your eye?"
punchlineDo I look like someone who's allowed to work with fucking acid?
tagI know you idiot, I ate a Tide Pod.