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Derek Spadey

Bucket Pull

Watch Derek Spadey's Kill Tony episode 730 set with a timestamped video, full transcript, and line-by-line joke breakdown. This set has 4 bits, 5 joke beats, 0.38 punch density, 0.60 tag density.

Career avg·4.00 bits/set·5.00 beats/set·0.38 punch density·0.60 tag density·1 set

This set·4 bits·5 beats·0.38 punch density·0.60 tag density

[Bit 1]

- I recently dated a girl with an ego so big

that she would yell out her own name in bed.

It used to mess with me

'cause it wasn't a very feminine name.

Like who names their daughter rape?

Let's get to some personal stuff.

[Bit 2]

All right, when I was six years old,

I told my parents I figured out that I was adopted.

My mom was like, "Who told you?"

I was like, "Who told me?"

My sister's Asian.

What am I, one of the slow kids?

Even at age six, you know two whites don't make a wong.

[Bit 3]

And then after the divorce, they just, like,

gave up on parenting.

Like, I don't know how to do anything right.

I kill so many houseplants.

I call my home plant parenthood.

If it hasn't been three months and I don't like the name,

I'm yanking it out of that pot.

[Bit 4]

Speaking of which, my girlfriend thinks

I don't want plants because she caught me throwing seeds away

in the shower one time.

This isn't true.

I love plants.

I want plants very much and I would love my plants,

no matter what.

Even if they turn out to be transplants.

All right, you guys have been great, I appreciate you.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Joke Type

double-meaning

Lines

setup- I recently dated a girl with an ego so big

setupthat she would yell out her own name in bed.

setupIt used to mess with me

setup'cause it wasn't a very feminine name.

punchlineLike who names their daughter rape?