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Kill Tony #172 - Doug Benson & Jerron Horton

2016-10-24

Heather Marulli

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Watch Heather Marulli's Kill Tony episode 172 set with a timestamped video, full transcript, and line-by-line joke breakdown. This set has 1 bit, 3 joke beats, 0.30 punch density, 1.00 tag density.

Career avg·1.00 bits/set·2.50 beats/set·0.33 punch density·1.75 tag density·2 sets

This set·1 bit·3 beats·0.30 punch density·1.00 tag density

[Bit 1]

- My ex recently texted me a screenshot

of his credit score, just to remind me

that he's human trash, just a terrible person.

I always knew he was bad because his name is a verb,

his name is Sway, which isn't a real name.

But I was suspicious of him for a while because he,

well he sent a text with the credit score that said,

numbers don't lie, mija.

And I was like, well that's interesting

because you lied about your age when we first started

going out.

And I found out he was actually 35.

He said he was 28.

But I was suspicious that he was older

because he had his old concert tickets on the wall.

And one of the concert tickets he had

was to Radiohead at the Hollywood Bowl in 2001.

I was like, oh, you appreciated Radiohead when you were 14.

This doesn't make sense.

So when I was suspicious he was older, I texted him.

I was like, how old are you really?

And he texted me back.

He goes, how old do you think I am from the way

that I sex you up?

And I said between 55 and 75 years old.

- Fuck yeah, Heather Marulli.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setup- My ex recently texted me a screenshot

setupof his credit score, just to remind me

setupthat he's human trash, just a terrible person.

setupI always knew he was bad because his name is a verb,

setuphis name is Sway, which isn't a real name.

setupBut I was suspicious of him for a while because he,

setupwell he sent a text with the credit score that said,

setupnumbers don't lie, mija.

setupAnd I was like, well that's interesting

setupbecause you lied about your age when we first started

punchlinegoing out.

tagAnd I found out he was actually 35.

tagHe said he was 28.