Set 10 · Episode 755
BHC Tommy
Bucket PullSmall Joke Book
Career avg·1.00 bits/set·7.00 beats/set·0.73 punch density·0.38 tag density·1 set
This set·1 bit·7 beats·0.73 punch density·0.38 tag density·Small Joke Book
Watch BHC Tommy’s set
Skips to 1:30:37 in the episode
[Bit 1]
Last Christmas, a Corpus Christi coroner
was in court for having intercourse with corpses.
And they said it was the best sex ever.
Magical even.
"Abracadabra," if you will.
Now that's what I call Netflix and chilled.
There's a burial plot twist.
The offender's actually a woman.
Thank the Lord for Rigor Mortis.
She testified that her favorite movies are "Die Hard"
and "Rise of the Living Dead."
In related news, a local drive-by shooting had 12 casualties.
That means she was down there gang banging gangbangers.
It was crypts and blood everywhere
with no regard for human life.
'Cause there wasn't any.
She's also facing sexual battery charges, literally,
because she had jumper cables hooked up to their nipples.
Here's the real shocker.
She only got caught because she got pregnant.
The dumbass was out there, raw dog and zombies,
when she should have been using
the Twilight birth control method.
That's when you bang only vampires.
And it works, because a vampire can't come inside
anywhere without permission first.
Bit 1 · Beat 1
Beat Details
Beat Premise
“'Abracadabra' sounds like 'a bra cadaver', and 'a bra cadaver' fits because necrophilia.”
Joke Type
phonetic-matchLines
setupLast Christmas, a Corpus Christi coroner
setupwas in court for having intercourse with corpses.
setupAnd they said it was the best sex ever.
setupMagical even.
punchline"Abracadabra," if you will.