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Kill Tony #167 - David Arquette & Steve Simeone

2016-10-13

Diego Atanacio

Bucket Pull

Watch Diego Atanacio's Kill Tony episode 167 set with a timestamped video, full transcript, and line-by-line joke breakdown. This set has 3 bits, 3 joke beats, 0.47 punch density, 2.00 tag density.

Career avg·3.00 bits/set·3.00 beats/set·0.47 punch density·2.00 tag density·1 set

This set·3 bits·3 beats·0.47 punch density·2.00 tag density

- Hello, I'm from Detroit.

[Bit 1]

I hitchhiked the whole way here,

and boy is my mouth tired.

Thanks for getting that joke.

One time, five minutes after that,

Someone in the corner was like, "Blow jobs."

[Bit 2]

That's prostitution.

Everyone knows the prostitution.

That's like the oldest profession ever,

but I call it bullshit,

'cause if that's true,

then how did the first guy pay for it

if he didn't have a job?

'Cause he's just like, "Thanks for the blow job.

"Here's a sheep."

And she's like, "Man, I can't break a sheep."

I've only got two cats.

Everyone knows two cats plus a blow job, dude,

I'm not a sheep make.

I may be a whore, but I am no thief.

I read that in the back of a Snapple cat.

[Bit 3]

It's actually a joke, I drove my car here tonight.

Anybody ever drive their car here tonight?

Nice, two people.

Hey, use my GPS to get here.

You ever use your GPS to get somewhere?

You've already been,

fuck yeah, Diego Atanasio.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setupI hitchhiked the whole way here,

punchlineand boy is my mouth tired.