2024-06-18

Set 6 · Episode 668

Cam Patterson

Bucket PullManBlackLarge Joke Book

Career avg·2.47 bits/set·3.88 beats/set·0.40 punch density·1.33 tag density·34 sets

This set·2 bits·3 beats·0.23 punch density·1.33 tag density

Watch Cam Patterson’s set

Skips to 1:07:29 in the episode

[Bit 1]

- All right, let's talk about beating bitches.

So listen, I know y'all seen that diddy shit,

diddy, diddy was hitting that girl in the elevator.

Has you seen it?

Did you see it?

Fuck you then, niggas not for you.

If you did see it though, diddy beat a bitch.

And a long time ago, in my auntie a thug,

my auntie a real discreet nigga.

And she sent me the video,

And she was like, "Hey, fuck, nigga.

You becoming somebody in life.

Don't be beating hoes.

Dot, dot, dot on camera."

What kind of fucking backwards ass advice is that, dog?

And I'm going to be like, oh, shit.

Never mind.

Come over here real quick, bitch.

[Bit 2]

The crazy thing about the Diddy thing, to me,

is like, I was always talking to my life, I don't--

listen, look at me.

I do not think hitting women is cool.

It's not dope.

You shouldn't do it.

I told my life, "If you gonna be good at something,

be the best at it."

And that nigga did it pretty fucking good at bitch-beatin'.

Listen, I've been tryna tuck a tile my whole life.

I've been tryna tuck a tile my whole life.

I can never tuck a tile and walk one step.

This nigga tuck a tile around a fucking hallway

and it kicked it with full velocity

without the tile untuck it.

Listen, if I had to rate it like he was a diver,

like he was a professional diver,

I'd give him a nine, you feel what I'm saying?

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Beat Premise

“Advice not to beat women on camera is widely understood but rarely said aloud.”

Joke Type

elephant-in-the-room

Lines

setup- All right, let's talk about beating bitches.

setupSo listen, I know y'all seen that diddy shit,

setupdiddy, diddy was hitting that girl in the elevator.

setupIf you did see it though, diddy beat a bitch.

setupAnd a long time ago, in my auntie a thug,

setupmy auntie a real discreet nigga.

setupAnd she sent me the video,

setupAnd she was like, "Hey, fuck, nigga.

setupYou becoming somebody in life.

setupDon't be beating hoes.

punchlineDot, dot, dot on camera."

tagWhat kind of fucking backwards ass advice is that, dog?

tagAnd I'm going to be like, oh, shit.

tagNever mind.

tagCome over here real quick, bitch.