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KT #706 - 2025 NYE HEB ARENA

2025-02-15

Casey Rocket

RegularManWhite

Watch Casey Rocket's Kill Tony episode 706 set with a timestamped video, full transcript, and line-by-line joke breakdown. This set has 4 bits, 4 joke beats, 0.40 punch density, 2.00 tag density.

Career avg·2.88 bits/set·4.38 beats/set·0.34 punch density·0.66 tag density·16 sets

This set·4 bits·4 beats·0.40 punch density·2.00 tag density

God, seeing your ears is gonna be nuts.

We're gonna run this school, man.

Marble, marble, hair.

The ritual's almost complete, Tony.

But one of us has to die for the other to truly be free.

Alexander wept for there were no more riffs left to conquer.

It's funny you bring that up, because...

[Bit 1]

...seven years ago tonight, my teacher, Miss Garlic,

Carly Garlic, she aired of the Garlic Fortune.

She -- old garlic money.

You guys would have loved her.

She pulled me aside and she said, "Titty boy LaCroix," and I said, "Speaking?"

And she said five words that changed my life.

She said, "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

And I told her the truth, Austin.

I said, "I want a relapse."

And she was startled.

I think she was startled because a relapse is predicated upon an initial addiction, but

she's a sheep.

She doesn't get me like you guys do.

[Bit 2]

So seven years ago I would have been 12.

I'm 19 now.

I've never looked better.

Maybe he's born with it.

Maybe it's from huffing ether.

But science isn't there yet to tell.

[Bit 3]

But it's funny to do drugs when you're 12 because two years before that you were 10.

So you're a little kid.

You're like a little kid.

Like I can remember doing air duster with my friends.

And we're 12 years old.

I can remember doing duster and my buddy would be like, "What's the biggest dog you've ever

seen?"

And I, "My neighbor's dog's fucking massive."

[Bit 4]

But you shouldn't do duster.

I've lost a lot of good friends like that.

Chris Benoit, Aaron Carter.

Chris Benoit couldn't happen to a nicer guy.

Especially around the holidays, but...

Chris Benoit murdered his family, allegedly.

I think Ray Mysterio did it.

But thank you, Casey Rocket, class of 2013.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setup...seven years ago tonight, my teacher, Miss Garlic,

setupShe pulled me aside and she said, "Titty boy LaCroix," and I said, "Speaking?"

setupAnd she said five words that changed my life.

setupShe said, "What do you want to be when you grow up?"

setupAnd I told her the truth, Austin.

punchlineI said, "I want a relapse."

tagAnd she was startled.

tagI think she was startled because a relapse is predicated upon an initial addiction, but

tagshe's a sheep.