Matt Scotting

Bucket Pull

Watch Matt Scotting's Kill Tony episode 455 set with a timestamped video, full transcript, and line-by-line joke breakdown. This set has 5 bits, 5 joke beats, 0.29 punch density, 0.00 tag density.

Career avg·5.00 bits/set·5.00 beats/set·0.29 punch density·0.00 tag density·1 set

This set·5 bits·5 beats·0.29 punch density·0.00 tag density

[Bit 1]

- If you don't eat humans, you're a cannibal.

But if you eat pussy, you're a cannibal.

[Bit 2]

If nuns are saving themselves for God,

And why did I do so much porn?

[Bit 3]

Now there's too many national days.

There's national pancake day, national bicycle day.

There's even national masturbation day.

This day, I really don't get it.

I just don't get it, okay?

When women celebrates it, people are like,

"Good for you, girl power."

So brave.

But when I wanna celebrate it,

people are like, "Ugh, gross, that's disgusting.

"Get off this bus."

[Bit 4]

Now, gimps and cowboys have a lot in common.

The word cowboy actually comes from back in the west and it means a man who wears leather.

So that means that gimps are massive, massive cowboys.

So yeah, they have a lot in common anyway.

[Bit 5]

So they both wear leather.

They both use handcuffs and saddles and they both get fucked by giant horse sticks.

That'll do.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Joke Type

double-meaning

Lines

setup- If you don't eat humans, you're a cannibal.

punchlineBut if you eat pussy, you're a cannibal.