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KILL TONY #575 - RON WHITE + BRIAN SIMPSON + RYAN LONG

2022-09-20

Kristy Nova

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Watch Kristy Nova's Kill Tony episode 575 set with a timestamped video, full transcript, and line-by-line joke breakdown. This set has 4 bits, 4 joke beats, 0.91 punch density, 1.00 tag density.

Career avg·4.00 bits/set·4.00 beats/set·0.91 punch density·1.00 tag density·1 set

This set·4 bits·4 beats·0.91 punch density·1.00 tag density

[Bit 1]

My love life's non-existent.

I'm so desperate, even my friend's three-year-old notices.

She keeps running around calling me "taxi"

'Cause even she knows that I'm kinda easy to hail,

but easy to get inside.

[Bit 2]

I wanna go around and start giving random guys massages

so my new nickname can be Plato.

'Cause I'm fun to play with and easy to mold.

You just have to keep me wet from time to time

so I don't dry out.

[Bit 3]

I don't know what guys want anymore.

I already have two different colors of hair.

This side I'm a girl with purple hair.

This side I'm a girl with teal hair.

Straightforward, it's like we're having a threesome.

Especially if I haven't taken my medication that day.

[Bit 4]

I hate that with this hair,

people just consider me one of two Ls, liberal or lesbian.

How am I supposed to tell them

that I like a nice cock and a cocked gun?

How do you put that?

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Joke Type

analogy

Lines

setupMy love life's non-existent.

setupI'm so desperate, even my friend's three-year-old notices.

setupShe keeps running around calling me "taxi"

punchline'Cause even she knows that I'm kinda easy to hail,

punchlinebut easy to get inside.