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Kill Tony #141 (Adam Ray, Matt Braunger)

2020-05-06

Mike Whalen

Bucket PullManWhite

Watch Mike Whalen's Kill Tony episode 141 set with a timestamped video, full transcript, and line-by-line joke breakdown. This set has 2 bits, 4 joke beats, 0.29 punch density, 0.75 tag density.

Career avg·2.00 bits/set·4.00 beats/set·0.29 punch density·0.75 tag density·1 set

This set·2 bits·4 beats·0.29 punch density·0.75 tag density

Hey, how you guys doing?

[Bit 1]

Good. I know what you're thinking.

He doesn't look Mexican.

Ugh.

I uh...

[Bit 2]

I do, I work construction unfortunately.

Made some bad choices in high school,

but back in the day I was in the Navy,

I joined at 19.

Fuck the Navy, right?

Yeah, no nothing for them.

I don't know why I joined.

I think the recruiter was really compelling.

I was young, he said it a lot like Christopher Walken,

who pulled me in the office.

He said, "Young man, I saw you out there

perusing the halls.

It looked like a lost puppy.

I'd be damned if I'm gonna see you wasting life,

chasing the muff around, smoking dope.

When I was your age, I was in Vietnam.

Long story short, I had to watch "Shoves Up My Ass."

It would take me around 126 minutes

to tell that entire story.

Young man, I want you to see the world with the Navy.

And he was right, I did get to see the world,

but he forgot to mention the world's 95% water.

I've seen every kind of water you can imagine.

And then I got out of the Navy,

and started working at Trader Joe's.

Thank you very much.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setupGood. I know what you're thinking.

punchlineHe doesn't look Mexican.