Michael Vargas on Kill Tony
2 sets·4.50 bits/set·5.00 beats/set·0.65 punch density·0.60 tag density
About Michael Vargas's sets
Michael Vargas has done 2 sets on Kill Tony, the first on episode #137 (6 May 2020) and the latest on episode #183 (3 Mar 2017).
Michael Vargas came to the show as a bucket pull, a comic whose name is drawn from the bucket for a one-minute set.
Michael Vargas has performed for guest panels including Ashley Barnhill.
Michael Vargas averages 0.65 laugh lines, punchlines and tags, for every setup or filler line. That is more than 84% of the 1,713 other comics PunchNotes has broken down.
On average Michael Vargas follows each punchline with 0.60 tags.
Of the 10 jokes PunchNotes has classified, 3 are misdirect jokes, ahead of phonetic-match (2).
Appearances
Jokes from Michael Vargas's sets
A few jokes from each set. Open a set for the full transcript and every joke.
KT #1833 Mar 2017
You think a woman's ever had so many abortions,
she's earned the nickname Sandy Hook?
Guys, relax.
I was like fucking four years ago.
I want to start a restaurant/whore house
and call it brothels.
We only serve soup.
Yeah, can I get the rim job and the chicken noodle?
KT #1376 May 2020
So, you know when you're a little kid and your parents aren't home, so you go look for your Christmas presents? And then you go in your mom's sock drawer and you find a dildo?
And then on Christmas morning, you're super bummed out when you open up a Nintendo 64.
So a lot of people think different things happen to you when you die. Like you go to heaven or hell or bugs eat you. What I like to think happens is I'll be reincarnated and I'll come back as like a bottle of Jack Daniels or some cocaine.
Then maybe my dad would still want me.
And also I get to be inside of him for once.