Philip Garcia on Kill Tony
2 sets·1.50 bits/set·3.50 beats/set·0.69 punch density·2.10 tag density
About Philip Garcia's sets
Philip Garcia has done 2 sets on Kill Tony, the first on episode #500 (13 Apr 2021) and the latest on episode #713 (1 Apr 2025).
Philip Garcia came to the show as a bucket pull, a comic whose name is drawn from the bucket for a one-minute set.
Philip Garcia has performed for guest panels including Sam Tallent, Ian Edwards and Joe Rogan.
Philip Garcia averages 0.69 laugh lines, punchlines and tags, for every setup or filler line. That is more than 86% of the 1,713 other comics PunchNotes has broken down.
On average Philip Garcia follows each punchline with 2.10 tags.
Of the 7 jokes PunchNotes has classified, 3 are reframe jokes, ahead of misdirect (2).
Appearances
Jokes from Philip Garcia's sets
A few jokes from each set. Open a set for the full transcript and every joke.
KT #7131 Apr 2025
I've been crushing up Plan B
and putting it in my girlfriend's eggs every morning.
Yeah, she's Latina, so it's a must.
She's Catholic, so I have to sneak it in somehow.
When guys shit, their dick and balls go inside the toilet bowl with it!" And I was like, "Yeah, that's crazy.
You put your mouth on that thing."
She was like, "It's in the water and everything!"
And I was like, "Sadly, we don't have that problem.
KT #50013 Apr 2021
And I still can't get a good deal on weed either. What the fuck is that about?
I don't know how to tell my dad that he needs to suck better dick.
Used to call him Papa Bear, not so much anymore, you know.