Drew Nickens

Golden TicketDisabledBlackYoungMan

Career avg·2.21 bits/set·4.79 beats/set·0.63 punch density·0.88 tag density·14 sets

This set·1 bit·4 beats·0.36 punch density·0.25 tag density

Watch Drew Nickens’s set

Skips to 1:36:33 in the episode

[Bit 1]

So I got sober three years ago when I walked into a Dollar General and I saw these white chocolate macadamia nuts.

When I tasted them, it felt like a Yu-Gi-Oh! card. I got one that was the best one and I fucking tasted

rebel. It was amazing.

But then I realized I had one package and I got so productive. It was like I was on meth.

I came in, I ran a 5k of blue jeans, I mowed my lawn.

I even did all 12 steps of AA.

Now I was feeding when I came back.

Pay back to the Dollar General, I was ready.

And then $15 generals and $6 trees later,

I couldn't find them.

It was like they were my Quaaludes.

And then I looked on Google.

And when I looked on Google, I found out this.

The company had been out of business for three years.

It was crazy. It was like they were right next to a tiny nuclear plant.

I didn't know if I was hurting my brain more or I was becoming a ninja turtle.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Beat Premise

“Sobriety implies clean living, but reveals the productivity felt exactly like meth.”

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setupSo I got sober three years ago when I walked into a Dollar General and I saw these white chocolate macadamia nuts.

setupWhen I tasted them, it felt like a Yu-Gi-Oh! card. I got one that was the best one and I fucking tasted

setuprebel. It was amazing.

punchlineBut then I realized I had one package and I got so productive. It was like I was on meth.

tagI came in, I ran a 5k of blue jeans, I mowed my lawn.