Martin Phillips

Golden TicketDisabledManWhite

Career avg·2.77 bits/set·3.04 beats/set·0.58 punch density·0.97 tag density·26 sets

This set·2 bits·2 beats·1.60 punch density·3.00 tag density

Watch Martin Phillips’s set

Skips to 8:16 in the episode

[Bit 1]

Mother's Day just happened.

I celebrate Mother's Day by impregnating women.

I'm spreading a holiday cheer.

You don't want to know what I do for Father's Day.

[Bit 2]

I went to Canada and this Canadian guy told me he came down here, went to a gun range,

it was so overwhelmed from shooting a gun, he cried.

And I just thought, man, it is going to be so easy to take over this country.

Oh my God.

Dude, stick that out before you hurt yourself.

Stick the hockey.

I used a gun. I did not cry. The person I shot cried.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Beat Premise

“Mother's Day implies tribute to mothers, but reveals impregnating women.”

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setupMother's Day just happened.

punchlineI celebrate Mother's Day by impregnating women.

tagI'm spreading a holiday cheer.

tagYou don't want to know what I do for Father's Day.