Hans Kim

RegularAsianMan

Career avg·3.24 bits/set·4.24 beats/set·0.59 punch density·0.49 tag density·49 sets

This set·4 bits·5 beats·0.57 punch density·0.60 tag density

Watch Hans Kim’s set

Skips to 2:01:47 in the episode

[Bit 1]

Oh yeah. Don't worry, I speak English.

This isn't the Super Bowl halftime show.

If I wanted to hear a bunch of Spanish, I'd go to a kitchen at Chili's.

Stop trying to make me learn things. This is America.

What's the point of having all these bombs if I have to learn?

[Bit 2]

I do think it's fucked up that a lot of Mexicans are getting deported.

I think if you're trying to reduce crime,

Deporting Mexicans is the least efficient way to do that.

I've never been walking down a dark alley

and heard the voice behind me be like,

"Give me your money."

It's usually some form of Ebonics.

The language of robberies.

[Bit 3]

Yeah, I recently saw a black guy gardening.

I was like, "Dude, you don't have to do that anymore."

You can do larceny and retail theft as well now.

[Bit 4]

I am working out right now.

You know, I don't have to be stronger than a black guy.

I just have to last long enough 'til the cops get there.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Beat Premise

“I speak English implies language barrier, but reveals Super Bowl halftime was Spanish.”

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setupOh yeah. Don't worry, I speak English.

punchlineThis isn't the Super Bowl halftime show.

tagIf I wanted to hear a bunch of Spanish, I'd go to a kitchen at Chili's.