Martin Phillips

Golden TicketDisabledManWhite

Career avg·2.77 bits/set·3.04 beats/set·0.58 punch density·0.97 tag density·26 sets

This set·2 bits·2 beats·0.50 punch density·2.00 tag density

Watch Martin Phillips’s set

Skips to 1:54:07 in the episode

[Bit 1]

I started to do this new thing on Baby Nabs.

I use my baby pictures.

And then I say, "Swipe right if you want to see how it turned out."

And, you know, better -- better -- better -- better --

Oh, my God! Oh, it happened!

Chill out. Chill out.

It's been 30 years, okay?

[Bit 2]

Have I -- Have anyone ever used a flash-flowing --

You know what?

I didn't know you have to lube it, you know?

'Cause I was doing it.

I was like, "This hurts."

Like, "How?"

And I -- I -- I don't know if I'm gonna come,

but if I bleed, you know?

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Beat Premise

“Baby photos on a dating app implies current attractiveness, but reveals current unattractiveness.”

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setupI started to do this new thing on Baby Nabs.

setupI use my baby pictures.

punchlineAnd then I say, "Swipe right if you want to see how it turned out."

tagAnd, you know, better -- better -- better -- better --

tagOh, my God! Oh, it happened!

tagChill out. Chill out.

tagIt's been 30 years, okay?