Ahren Belisle

Golden TicketManDisabled

Career avg·1.67 bits/set·4.17 beats/set·1.40 punch density·2.86 tag density·6 sets

This set·1 bit·4 beats·0.83 punch density·1.50 tag density

Watch Ahren Belisle’s set

Skips to 1:22:25 in the episode

[Bit 1]

Being disabled, I often run into people

who try to recruit Jesus to fix me.

I was in a taxi one time and he pulled over to tell me

that he once cured an ear infection by praying.

He says he can cure me since cerebral palsy

and ear infections are exactly the same.

I don't have a lot of options, so I'm like,

okay, let's see what you got big boy.

Didn't work?

I tried to pray his body odor away.

That didn't work either.

This poor broken man was so sad.

I actually needed to apologize to him

for still being disabled.

It's okay, buddy.

It's okay.

You'll get it next time.

I still have faith in you.

It's not you, it's me.

Next time a religious person tries to pray to heal me,

I'm gonna start curling up the other arm

and say you made it worse.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Beat Premise

“Cerebral palsy is like an ear infection because both have prayer cures.”

Joke Type

analogy

Lines

setupBeing disabled, I often run into people

setupwho try to recruit Jesus to fix me.

setupI was in a taxi one time and he pulled over to tell me

setupthat he once cured an ear infection by praying.

setupHe says he can cure me since cerebral palsy

punchlineand ear infections are exactly the same.