2026-02-17

Set 11 · Episode 756

Jordan McDonald

Bucket PullLarge Joke Book

Career avg·1.00 bits/set·1.00 beats/set·0.35 punch density·6.00 tag density·1 set

This set·1 bit·1 beat·0.35 punch density·6.00 tag density·Large Joke Book

Watch Jordan McDonald’s set

Skips to 1:37:33 in the episode

[Bit 1]

I've been traveling a lot lately.

When I go to new cities, what I like to do is I like to buy weed.

I like to take that weed and go to parks.

I like to smoke that weed in parks, and I like to watch homeless people.

That's how I judge how much I like the city.

I suggest y'all try it.

I was in Toronto, Ontario, Canada,

not too long ago, any Canadians in here?

Boo, USA, USA, stay with me brother, USA.

I'm gonna start a clam rally in this bit.

No, I was in Toronto, Ontario, Canada,

smoking weed in parks, watching homeless people

not bother nobody doing my thing.

And I see this homeless man walking by himself.

There's nobody else around him.

And he just says out loud,

I only smoke crack on the weekends.

And guess what, big daddy?

It's the weekend.

That's a five-star homeless man right there.

You mean to tell me you're a disciplined crack addict?

It's like, hey Reggie, what you do tonight, baby?

You want some crack?

Nah, nigga, it's Tuesday.

Don't start my crack 'til Thursday, 11.58 p.m.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Beat Premise

“Weekend-only crack use implies discipline, but reveals immediate crack eligibility.”

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setupI've been traveling a lot lately.

setupWhen I go to new cities, what I like to do is I like to buy weed.

setupI like to take that weed and go to parks.

setupI like to smoke that weed in parks, and I like to watch homeless people.

setupThat's how I judge how much I like the city.

setupI suggest y'all try it.

setupI was in Toronto, Ontario, Canada,

setupNo, I was in Toronto, Ontario, Canada,

setupsmoking weed in parks, watching homeless people

setupnot bother nobody doing my thing.

setupAnd I see this homeless man walking by himself.

setupThere's nobody else around him.

setupAnd he just says out loud,

setupI only smoke crack on the weekends.

setupAnd guess what, big daddy?

punchlineIt's the weekend.

tagThat's a five-star homeless man right there.

tagYou mean to tell me you're a disciplined crack addict?

tagIt's like, hey Reggie, what you do tonight, baby?

tagYou want some crack?

tagNah, nigga, it's Tuesday.

tagDon't start my crack 'til Thursday, 11.58 p.m.