Set 6 · Episode 675
Kam Patterson
RegularManBlackSmall Joke Book
Career avg·1.87 bits/set·3.13 beats/set·0.33 punch density·1.36 tag density·15 sets
This set·3 bits·5 beats·0.55 punch density·2.40 tag density
Watch Kam Patterson’s set
Skips to 47:32 in the episode
[Bit 1]
- So, when I go to new places,
I like to go on guided tours to find out where I'm at.
But I have a rule about guided tours.
If I go on a guided tour, I respect the tour
as much as the tour guide respects the tour.
When I was in Green Bay, the tour guide
respected the tour with utmost respect.
He loved the Green Bay Packers.
I felt like I was on a team when I was in Green Bay.
These are my people.
I love them.
I'm like, I fuck with you.
Hell, yeah, we on a same boat.
Let's ride.
I respected the tour with my utmost respect.
I went to Louisville this weekend.
And I went to Louisville Sluggers Museum and factory.
And the tour guide was like, "Nigga, these the bats."
You see them?
"These the bats, do what you want."
So I gave two fucks about that whole tour at all, right?
[Bit 2]
So at one point during the tour,
they had like these bats you could touch,
and I seen some colorful bats in the distance.
So I said, "Mm."
I'm gonna go tell the colorful bats,
and I start swinging the bats,
and do a crazy swithing of bats and shit like that,
knocking just on my shoe.
And then,
At one point, the tour caught up with me, right?
And they were like, "Hey, now these bats over here
are the untouchable bats that we sell to MLB players."
And I was like, "Oh, shit."
Somebody tell Aaron Judge, "I'm sorry," right?
And how fucking that bat up.
[Bit 3]
Now, the funnest part about the tour was,
on the tour, it was a bunch of, like, high schoolers and shit
that loved baseball, 'cause they wanted to go to MLB
when they grew up and get older.
And I believe in dreams.
I'm a drink-chaser myself.
I told them, I said, "Oh, you niggas right here.
Oh, y'all.
all nine of y'all I hope most y'all make it to MLB then I walked away then I
remember wait a minute any of you niggas Dominican and they was like no I know
well y'all are fucked brother y'all not gonna make it I'm sorry y'all not gonna
do it gang y'all gonna be a countess or something like that that's it
Bit 1 · Beat 1
Beat Details
Beat Premise
“A passionate tour guide could be why tourists feel like teammates.”
Joke Type
reframeLines
setup- So, when I go to new places,
setupI like to go on guided tours to find out where I'm at.
setupBut I have a rule about guided tours.
setupIf I go on a guided tour, I respect the tour
setupas much as the tour guide respects the tour.
setupWhen I was in Green Bay, the tour guide
setuprespected the tour with utmost respect.
setupHe loved the Green Bay Packers.
punchlineI felt like I was on a team when I was in Green Bay.
tagThese are my people.
tagI love them.
tagI'm like, I fuck with you.
tagHell, yeah, we on a same boat.
tagLet's ride.
tagI respected the tour with my utmost respect.