Set 7 · Episode 658
Kam Patterson
RegularManBlackSmall Joke Book
Career avg·1.87 bits/set·3.13 beats/set·0.33 punch density·1.36 tag density·15 sets
This set·1 bit·4 beats·0.19 punch density·0.50 tag density
Watch Kam Patterson’s set
Skips to 1:10:41 in the episode
[Bit 1]
I seen somebody, this is sick,
let me see this real quick.
I seen somebody die a couple of days ago
on a bird scooter and it fucked me up, dog.
You feel what I'm saying?
'Cause my first thought was,
if that scooter not broken,
they not throwing that bitch away.
My other thought was,
I wanted to take the scooter
'cause he had somewhere to go,
he was still logged in on it.
He ain't either, he was dead as shit.
And I was late for a show I had to be at,
And it's weird 'cause he died in front of like a comedian.
I'm a fucked up person.
I don't think good thoughts, you know what I'm saying?
Like if you died in front of you good sir,
you'd have been like, "Oh my gosh,
"somebody just died in my face.
"That's so fucking sad."
My first thought, "Well, you died in the school,
"the nigga, that's gay."
Imagine you with your homeboy, you with all your dogs,
and somebody come with you,
but I can tell you how you finna die.
And there's three of them, right?
He go, "You gonna die at 9/7 with your whole family around."
And he go, "The other guy, you gonna die at 74
by yourself 'cause you a bitch, right?"
And he get the last, he said,
"You gonna die at 32 on a scooter."
Well, I'll tell you that.
Bit 1 · Beat 1
Beat Details
Beat Premise
“A fatal scooter crash could be leaving a reusable scooter.”
Joke Type
reframeLines
setupI seen somebody, this is sick,
setupI seen somebody die a couple of days ago
setupon a bird scooter and it fucked me up, dog.
setup'Cause my first thought was,
setupif that scooter not broken,
punchlinethey not throwing that bitch away.