Set 14 · Episode 680
David Lucas
RegularBlackMan
Career avg·2.73 bits/set·3.88 beats/set·0.64 punch density·1.32 tag density·49 sets
This set·2 bits·6 beats·0.87 punch density·1.17 tag density
Watch David Lucas’s set
Skips to 2:20:40 in the episode
[Bit 1]
Being a comedian, we don't do much during the day
and I felt kinda like my life wasn't worth shit.
So I started volunteering.
I started volunteering at the Cancer Research Center.
And it's kinda neat because you get to meet people
who are more fucked up than you.
And I met this 29 year old girl who had six months to live
in one of her last dying wishes,
is that she wanted to get her pussy ate one last time.
And of course I volunteer, you know what I'm saying?
And it's so funny because every time she would orgasm,
she would flatline.
I was like, "Babe!"
I'm like, "Goddamn, bitch."
[Bit 2]
And it's so weird because all you women
think y'all be doing some shit
when y'all be shaving or waxing y'all pussy.
Let me tell you, waxed pussy ain't got shit
on chemotherapy pussy, nigga, that is.
That is the smoothest pussy in the world, nigga, that's.
That shit was like a manatee's back, you know what I'm sayin'?
That shit was rain resistant, water was dripping off of that motherfucker.
I'm trying to get my girlfriend to get cancer now.
I be blowing cigarette smoke in her face.
I got that bitch sleeping next to a microwave.
Like, come on, bitch, what the fuck we waiting on?
Bit 1 · Beat 1
Beat Details
Beat Premise
“Volunteering could be a way to feel better by meeting sicker people.”
Joke Type
reframeLines
setupBeing a comedian, we don't do much during the day
setupand I felt kinda like my life wasn't worth shit.
setupSo I started volunteering.
setupI started volunteering at the Cancer Research Center.
setupAnd it's kinda neat because you get to meet people
punchlinewho are more fucked up than you.