Celia Contreras

Bucket PullWomanLatinoLarge Joke Book

Career avg·2.00 bits/set·4.50 beats/set·0.43 punch density·0.17 tag density·2 sets

This set·2 bits·6 beats·0.58 punch density·0.00 tag density

Watch Celia Contreras’s set

Skips to 1:40:03 in the episode

[Bit 1]

I'm a bigger girl, so I have to take two plan B pills

in case the first one gets lost.

I actually think they call it Hidden Valley Ranch

because the more I eat it, the less visible

my vagina becomes.

[Bit 2]

You guys like dad jokes?

Here's one, my dad had a really long rap sheet.

Sometimes I'd wrap it around myself

and pretend he was hugging me.

What was weird was there was a lot of domestic abuse charges on there,

and that doesn't feel right. He was here illegally.

I don't think they've been imported abuse charges.

My dad did a lot of drugs and alcohol.

The only good time he could do a straight line was if a dollar bill was involved.

My favorite stepdad was very open-minded,

especially when that .45 caliber tore through the back of his head.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Beat Premise

“Body size becomes so extreme that emergency contraception can get lost.”

Joke Type

hyperbole

Lines

setupI'm a bigger girl, so I have to take two plan B pills

punchlinein case the first one gets lost.