David Lucas

RegularBlackMan

Career avg·2.73 bits/set·3.88 beats/set·0.64 punch density·1.32 tag density·49 sets

This set·3 bits·3 beats·0.83 punch density·2.33 tag density

Watch David Lucas’s set

Skips to 55:12 in the episode

[Bit 1]

Girls swear it hurt us when they tell us

you'll never meet another woman like me.

And it's kinda like, bitch,

that was what I was aiming for.

[Bit 2]

Like love is not hard to find.

Women always make it seem like

you'll never love again like you love me.

Like I convince myself to love a dog

and all that nigga do is piss

to need. So it won't be too hard to love a bitch that fucks me and get on my nerves.

It's not. Love is not hard. Who the fuck won't fall in love with somebody that fucks some

[Bit 3]

three or four times a week? Like I be in love like a motherfucker. I think the perfect woman

is a deaf mute. I think that's my perfect chick. She can't hear shit or say shit. Like

Helen Keller would have been my perfect bitch.

That'd be a 10 in my book.

I want me old Helen Keller ass bitch.

You can't see your hair?

Oh, hell yeah, you won't see me cheating on your ass.

Then you won't hear me opening this door at four

in the morning.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Beat Premise

“A breakup threat implies loss, but reveals exactly the desired outcome.”

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setupGirls swear it hurt us when they tell us

setupyou'll never meet another woman like me.

setupAnd it's kinda like, bitch,

punchlinethat was what I was aiming for.