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Chris Silio

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Watch Chris Silio's Kill Tony episode 730 set with a timestamped video, full transcript, and line-by-line joke breakdown. This set has 3 bits, 3 joke beats, 0.59 punch density, 2.33 tag density.

Career avg·2.67 bits/set·4.33 beats/set·0.78 punch density·1.61 tag density·3 sets

This set·3 bits·3 beats·0.59 punch density·2.33 tag density

[Bit 1]

All I did before I went blind was jerk off

and play video games.

And then God was like, "That's enough."

Yeah!

I'd give you a gift and you wasted it, son.

I'm gonna let you guys in a little secret.

I'd do it all again tomorrow.

I wouldn't have changed the goddamn thing, dude.

Give it up for my roommate for bringing me out here, dude.

[Bit 2]

He's a way better roommate.

My last roommate sucked.

He just didn't really care about personal space.

He would always hang out in my room.

Yeah.

So every time I'd go to jerk off,

I'd have to be like, "Hello?"

Is anyone there?

Which, by the way, if you ever hear me say hello, is anyone there?

You have about 30 seconds before I start jerking off.

Thank you.

Wow.

You should say something, all right?

Or else it's on you, not me.

[Bit 3]

I don't want to hear about it in the papers later.

The guy who kind of looks like Louis CK does exactly what Louis CK did.

This Celio, can I cut you off? I'm the other way buddy, I'm over here.

Shit! Shit!

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setupAll I did before I went blind was jerk off

setupand play video games.

punchlineAnd then God was like, "That's enough."

tagI'd give you a gift and you wasted it, son.

setupI'm gonna let you guys in a little secret.

tagI'd do it all again tomorrow.

tagI wouldn't have changed the goddamn thing, dude.