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2025-07-15

Mike Ryan

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Watch Mike Ryan's Kill Tony episode 727 set with a timestamped video, full transcript, and line-by-line joke breakdown. This set has 2 bits, 4 joke beats, 0.57 punch density, 1.00 tag density.

Career avg·2.00 bits/set·3.33 beats/set·0.45 punch density·1.33 tag density·3 sets

This set·2 bits·4 beats·0.57 punch density·1.00 tag density·Big Joke Book

[Bit 1]

One thing that I've discovered about doing comedy

is that I don't fit in.

I don't fit into the comedy scene in Houston where I'm from.

I don't fit in with all these other comedians.

Mainly because they all grew up class clowns,

or they're molested.

The lucky ones were both.

And I feel like at 37 years old, I'm

too old for those things to happen for me.

At least without being my fault.

Like if I get molested at 37 years old, that's on me.

That's my bad.

What was I wearing?

[Bit 2]

It's been kind of a tough year.

They took away Pornhub in Texas.

Got so bad this morning at Jackoff using my imagination.

Turns out, I'm pretty fucking gay, dude.

I had no idea.

How am I supposed to tell my mom

that I'm a Democrat now?

I'm not gonna be one without the other.

Thank you.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setupOne thing that I've discovered about doing comedy

setupis that I don't fit in.

setupI don't fit into the comedy scene in Houston where I'm from.

setupI don't fit in with all these other comedians.

setupMainly because they all grew up class clowns,

setupor they're molested.

punchlineThe lucky ones were both.