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Kill Tony #131 (Aaron Kleiber, Ashley Barnhill)

2020-05-06

John Dick Winters

Bucket Pull

Watch John Dick Winters's Kill Tony episode 131 set with a timestamped video, full transcript, and line-by-line joke breakdown. This set has 2 bits, 2 joke beats, 0.43 punch density, 2.00 tag density.

Career avg·2.00 bits/set·2.00 beats/set·0.43 punch density·2.00 tag density·1 set

This set·2 bits·2 beats·0.43 punch density·2.00 tag density

That's my given name. That's what someone thought was a good idea in 30 years ago in the hospital.

[Bit 1]

I spent a lot of time on Craigslist for not what you're thinking.

I've always been in fraud jobs. I've always been a little extra money.

And there's great opportunities in Craigslist.

I found this affluent couple looking for someone to house and douse them for them while they're away on vacation.

and they hired me.

They hired me, like it was a phone interview, obviously.

I didn't sit down with this rich couple,

and after 20 minutes in the cup of Earl Grey,

they're like, "Oh yeah, well, the hips are over,

"hang out at her house unsupervised for a week,

"that sounds perfect."

It was a phone interview.

[Bit 2]

I'm not sure if anyone here has ever had the pleasure

of house sitting before, but house sitting is very similar.

It's extremely similar to having complete strangers

give you money to masturbate in every room of the house.

But it is good work if you forget it. Oh my gosh.

It's like looking for wedding pictures like, "Oh, she looks good."

Get more than you get. Go to the kids' room. Whatever. I don't know.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setupI spent a lot of time on Craigslist for not what you're thinking.

setupI've always been in fraud jobs. I've always been a little extra money.

setupAnd there's great opportunities in Craigslist.

setupI found this affluent couple looking for someone to house and douse them for them while they're away on vacation.

setupand they hired me.

setupThey hired me, like it was a phone interview, obviously.

setupI didn't sit down with this rich couple,

setupand after 20 minutes in the cup of Earl Grey,

setupthey're like, "Oh yeah, well, the hips are over,

setup"hang out at her house unsupervised for a week,

punchline"that sounds perfect."

tagIt was a phone interview.