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2025-07-08

Candace August

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Watch Candace August's Kill Tony episode 726 set with a timestamped video, full transcript, and line-by-line joke breakdown. This set has 1 bit, 3 joke beats, 0.44 punch density, 1.33 tag density.

Career avg·1.33 bits/set·3.00 beats/set·0.49 punch density·1.94 tag density·3 sets

This set·1 bit·3 beats·0.44 punch density·1.33 tag density

[Bit 1]

- All right, my husband's Muslim,

and when we got married,

we had to do the Islamic wedding ritual.

For those of you who do not know,

the Islamic wedding ritual is called the niqkah.

I will spell it for you.

It is N as in Nancy, I, K as in Kangaroo,

A, H as in Harold, the knicker.

Problem is I had not seen that word written down

before I heard that shit out loud.

Picture it.

On my wedding day, I'm standing there in my dress.

I'm looking at my husband, so in love.

The guy walks in, he's like,

"We are gathered here today

"to celebrate this blessed knicker."

He kept going, "In the eyes of our love,

"all knickers are beautiful and wonderful.

"This knicker today is special."

I was just like, "What the fuck did this nigga say?

"What did he say?"

Thanks for the compliments, dude,

but you can call me Candace.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Joke Type

phonetic-match

Lines

setup- All right, my husband's Muslim,

setupand when we got married,

setupwe had to do the Islamic wedding ritual.

setupFor those of you who do not know,

setupthe Islamic wedding ritual is called the niqkah.

setupI will spell it for you.

setupIt is N as in Nancy, I, K as in Kangaroo,

punchlineA, H as in Harold, the knicker.