Dan Nolan

Bucket PullManWhite

Watch Dan Nolan's Kill Tony episode 196 set with a timestamped video, full transcript, and line-by-line joke breakdown. This set has 6 bits, 6 joke beats, 0.67 punch density, 0.33 tag density.

Career avg·3.75 bits/set·4.25 beats/set·0.50 punch density·0.98 tag density·8 sets

This set·6 bits·6 beats·0.67 punch density·0.33 tag density

- What's happening?

[Bit 1]

I just flew in from a lesbian wedding

and boy are my moms tired.

[Bit 2]

I got that new iPhone app that shows you

all the sex offenders around you live,

but it doesn't let you swipe right

or send them wanks or anything.

[Bit 3]

I'm starting a new band.

The sound that we're going for is gonna be like a cross

between Simon and Garfunkel, like just those two guys.

[Bit 4]

I ordered a Vietnamese prostitute

and she showed up at my house three hours early.

She wanted to love me wrong time.

[Bit 5]

I always confused the words optimist and optometrist.

I asked a guy to check on my glasses,

he said he thought they were half full.

[Bit 6]

Found out recently the penguins made for life.

I wish somebody had told me that

before I fucked all those penguins,

they will not leave me alone.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setupI just flew in from a lesbian wedding

punchlineand boy are my moms tired.