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Kill Tony #160 (Erik Griffin, Michael Kosta)

2018-12-27

Julian Fernandez

Bucket PullManLatino

Watch Julian Fernandez's Kill Tony episode 160 set with a timestamped video, full transcript, and line-by-line joke breakdown. This set has 3 bits, 3 joke beats, 0.29 punch density, 1.00 tag density.

Career avg·3.00 bits/set·3.00 beats/set·0.28 punch density·1.50 tag density·2 sets

This set·3 bits·3 beats·0.29 punch density·1.00 tag density

[Bit 1]

- Wanna get something out of the way?

I'm not Native American, I'm not Hawaiian.

I will realize I have very small eyes.

It's just 'cause it's very bright, I'm really high.

That's all that is.

[Bit 2]

I'll let you guys know I'm 100% Mexican, 100%.

I know I don't really come off it.

I'm really light skinned,

which was a big issue when I was a kid.

I remember my brother and my sister

used to try to convince me I was white and adopted.

Funny now, but it worked, I believe that I'm 100%.

And I remember running to my mom in tears,

Just crying, just, "Mom, am I adopted?"

I'll never forget this, mom looked at me in the eye.

She started tearing up herself, she said,

"Julian, believe me when I tell you,

"I would never adopt you."

Fucked up, but I believe her.

[Bit 3]

Another big thing, I'm kind of weird in Mexican.

I hate tamales, which is a big sin if you're Mexican.

Kind of fucked up, yeah.

It's like hearing an Asian person hates rice,

or a black person hates chicken,

or a white person hates privilege.

It sounds weird.

My name is Julian, thank you very much.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setup- Wanna get something out of the way?

setupI'm not Native American, I'm not Hawaiian.

setupI will realize I have very small eyes.

punchlineIt's just 'cause it's very bright, I'm really high.

tagThat's all that is.