Liz Splatt

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Watch Liz Splatt's Kill Tony episode 706 set with a timestamped video, full transcript, and line-by-line joke breakdown. This set has 2 bits, 4 joke beats, 0.33 punch density, 0.20 tag density.

Career avg·2.50 bits/set·4.50 beats/set·0.27 punch density·0.20 tag density·2 sets

This set·2 bits·4 beats·0.33 punch density·0.20 tag density

[Bit 1]

Guys, this year makes 10 years that I've been a cancer survivor.

I had cancer when I was 19, which is tough,

because you're too young to really understand what's going on,

and then you're too old to meet John Cena.

You know, 'cause at 19, you're like, "Make a wish!"

More like, "Make me squirt, John! What the fuck?

Hey, John, my pussy's bald too!"

You know.

John Cena and squirting.

Thank you.

[Bit 2]

It's tricky to make a cancer joke, you know?

Cancer's a really tricky topic.

One time this comic told me that it's important to talk about the tricky topics.

He said that he learned that because he used to talk a lot about how he used to fuck a

lot of prostitutes.

And I was like, "I don't know if we're talking about the same thing."

But once I thought about it, it made sense because probably the only thing more traumatic

and childhood cancer is being a prostitute a comedian can afford.

Am I right?

All right.

Thank you.

Thank you guys so much.

What a dream.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Joke Type

reframe

Lines

setupGuys, this year makes 10 years that I've been a cancer survivor.

setupI had cancer when I was 19, which is tough,

setupbecause you're too young to really understand what's going on,

punchlineand then you're too old to meet John Cena.