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KT #672 - DONALD TRUMP (SHANE GILLIS) + JOE BIDEN (ADAM RAY)

2024-07-16

David Lucas

RegularManBlackMedium Joke Book

Watch David Lucas's Kill Tony episode 672 set with a timestamped video, full transcript, and line-by-line joke breakdown. This set has 2 bits, 2 joke beats, 0.27 punch density, 2.50 tag density.

Career avg·2.63 bits/set·3.91 beats/set·0.61 punch density·1.20 tag density·65 sets

This set·2 bits·2 beats·0.27 punch density·2.50 tag density

Yeah.

Ain't so crazy.

[Bit 1]

I got handcuffed the other night

and believe it or not, Tony was there to save my ass.

But when I was handcuffed, it was so weird

because my girlfriend was there and she's like,

"Baby, give me the code to your phone

"so I can call your lawyer."

And I was like, "Officer, take me to jail."

I'm not gonna let you have fun in my phone, bitch,

and block all my hoes, what the fuck was that?

[Bit 2]

I don't know, bro, I gotta fucking go see somebody, bro,

because a lot of bad shit been following me lately.

I was in LA like seven weeks ago,

and the Muslim community tried to come for me,

because this fat 400-pound Muslim lady

was in the front row at my show in LA.

And she had on the biggest job I've ever seen in my life.

It was like king size, you know what I'm saying?

King bed sometimes.

But she was on her phone texting the whole time

I was on stage.

And I'm like, hey, bitch, what the fuck?

What are you doing?

And she's like, be funny.

And I'm like, oh, really?

So I'm like, good thing you're not a terrorist

because if you were, it would take three phone calls

to blow you up.

And that bitch ran out of the room

and I'm like a little more of that

and you'll be all right, bitch.

That's my time, take it.

Bit 1 · Beat 1

Beat Details

Joke Type

misdirect

Lines

setupI got handcuffed the other night

setupand believe it or not, Tony was there to save my ass.

setupBut when I was handcuffed, it was so weird

setupbecause my girlfriend was there and she's like,

setup"Baby, give me the code to your phone

setup"so I can call your lawyer."

punchlineAnd I was like, "Officer, take me to jail."

tagI'm not gonna let you have fun in my phone, bitch,

tagand block all my hoes, what the fuck was that?