[Bit 1]
Real shit, I have, it's weird, man,
I think if you're a straight man
and you have more than one gay friend,
I think they're plotting on you,
and they gonna get you in a dark room
That's what's gonna happen, brother.
They on your ass, nigga, literally.
They gonna put a dick in it.
[Bit 2]
And, uh, I got one gay friend.
I grew up with one of my whole life.
I'm not gonna say his last name.
I gotta be disrespectful.
His name is Tyrone Jones.
He lived two-door diapily my whole life.
And when he came out, his gay made me upset.
I wasn't angry because he was gay.
I was angry because we did things together
that two men should not do what one of them is gay.
We did a lot of together. We played basketball together.
We played football together.
Me and Tyrone fucked the bitch together.
We was in 11th grade. We was at his grandma's house.
It was 12 o'clock at night, on a school night, on a Tuesday.
I was fucking her from the back.
She was right here, Tyrone was fucking her face, man.
And we was high-fiving and shit like this.
a good old-fashioned Eiffel Tower, dog.
That's a great court memory for two straight young men.
When one of them become gay,
that's a totally different memory, dog.
And when it came out, he was like,
"When everybody know, bro, I'm gay and I like men."
And I was like, "Listen." I'm a hobo like, "Listen,
but we don't care. We love you, bro.
We still love you." I was like, "Wait a minute, bitch.
"We fucked a bitch together.
What do you mean you not gay?"
"What do you mean you gay?"
And he looked at me and he went,
"Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha."
"You know how I stayed hard the whole time?"
And I went home and I cried that night.
