Hi guys. Who here isn't fired?
Attend and fire yourself. One person and see a comic. Oh, okay.
[Bit 1]
Okay, I believe that. You know when you get fired and it comes as a shock to you?
Because you're smarter than your boss. You're like, "You're going to fire me?"
That's not possible, dude. I already fired you.
I decided your dumb ass was my boss's second week of working here.
So at this point you just say whatever, you just don't care.
You're like, "Listen, I don't care about you or your family.
All I know is your wife's named is Cunt,
and then she eats a lot of cheese and chicken at the company holiday party."
Honestly, this coffee maker could break and choke on a bean.
So you give up, you go back to your desk in your little civil chair,
you make the chair go up and down because that's the only control you have in life.
You're like, "I can make it go as high as I want, as low as I want."
I'm like the CEO of his chair.
It's actually really funny.
I mean, fun fact, I literally only work in an office officially in any capacity annually
for one week from 10 a.m. until, you know, like 10 p.m.
during the week of the taping of the Comedy Central Roast.
I help write for the celebrities on the roast.
Today was my first day doing that office job
and I, indeed, spent a lot of the day
That is one of the interesting things.
You lift up the weight, you lift up the thing,
I sit down and I put it back down.
I spin around over and over again,
thinking about these fucking dumb ass celebrities that i have to make fun of
and i i just keep doing it over and over again so i can actually relate to the
weird chair that technology is amazing i wonder if i can happen 'cause there was
[Bit 2]
a guy at a meeting and there was like a dude that was just like too tall for the
chair is like how could i bring that shit down
exactly in some dude was like that's fucking you know what i actually know
who uh... actually know who invented uh... that chair was after a tidy
I bet. She sat and became a swivel chair.
